How To Diet And Get Your Friends Off Your Back

Friends and family rarely have ill intent when it comes time to order dessert but the result often means you're at a loss of words, you succumb and you're left with frustration when you get on the scale.  Sometimes you just need simple suggestions of what to say or what to do to avoid a disaster.  Here are a few things to do when you're being cajoled into having an extra 400 calories of mud pie.

Situation:  When out at a bar or party and you're not drinking, your friends want you to be drinking with them and joining in the craziness of being buzzed.

• What To Do:

- Garnish in your soda, like lime or lemon, your friends will assume it is a rum and coke.

- A smallish bar glass of Perrier with a thin sipping straw and lime. Your friends will assume it's a vodka tonic. 

Situation:  You're out with your friends at a restaurant and your friends order appetizers and dessert and you want to pass

• What To Say:

- "I'm so lucky I'm not a sugar person. Now if there were a bag of cheetos in front of me..."

- "I don't care for any of these desserts! Why don't they have my (insert favorite dessert here)?  It's just not worth it. "

- And if you have the courage - (this will build in time if it's not here at this moment, it will be): "I've been working out so hard and have been so disciplined on my diet, I just don't want to throw myself off with dessert  It's been great to see the scale tip down - I am so excited that I'm finally on a track to get in shape."

• What You Can Do: 

- Incorporate the 3 bite rule.  Have three bites and no one will say a word. 

- Suggest an appetizer or dessert that you don't like, then you won't have a problem with wanting it.

Situation:  Dealing with the looks, disappointments and comments when you're at your  mother in laws, friends, or any other dinner party and you choose to pass on seconds thirds and fourth.

• What To Say: 

- "This is the best food in the world!  I am stuffed.  There's something about home cooking that makes you feel so nourished and satisfied, I just love it.

• What To Do: 

- Pack your plate with more vegetables (as long as you know they haven't been smothered in butter!)

Situation:  When you're out with your husband and he means well by saying, you've been doing so well!  Let's have fried clams!  Or Just order a tiramisu!"

• What To Say: 

- "Honey, you are so right, I've been looking this good because I haven't had dessert!  Why stop now?  If he presses:  Ask a simple question, "Would you like some and you don't want to be alone?  Probe him to find out what the reason is behind the desire for you to have all the extra food.

Final note:  If you are feeling pressured and you're not sure what to say, it's always a good idea to go on the offense rather than defense.  Rather than "answer" the pressure and explain why you're passing on dessert, it's a better strategy to employ "distraction and ask a question instead such as, "I'm going to pass, so I forgot to ask you, how was New Years Eve?"  Diverting attention and distraction, the number one strategy for a 2 year old, works for adults as well.

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